Sairentokiru [Finished]

Age : 29 Posts : 62

Name: Sairentokiru (Translates to (Silent Kill)
Quantity:Carry 1 Bow and a Quiver which can hold up to 25 Arrows.
Rank: C/B
Appearance:

The Bow is 50 Centimetres long. It is Thin and lightweight. The wood gets thinner as it gets closer to the Bow tips. In the Middle of the bow is a softer type of wood which is darker than the rest of the bow. On the Bow Tips there are string nocks that holds the Bowstring in place. The wood of this Bow is very flexible.

Each arrow is around 30 Centimetres long. They have tiny feathers on the end to make them fly easier. There is also a tiny, lighweighted arrow top. Each arrow is held in a quiver which is brown and it has a furlike outside and a solid inside. There is a strap on it so that it can go on to the persons shoulder. There is several parts inside the the quiver that hold the arrows in place.
Special Abilities/Characteristics:It is very effective when attacking long range and it always makes quiet kills (except when the victim moans from pain). When the User is B rank they can learn how to put their Chakra inside the bow and arrows. Once done the Bow can withstand almost anything, It depends on how strong the users chakra is. However the bow has a stream of chakra, When you have only a small bit of chakra left, the stream will break and the bow will no longer be able to withstand attacks (this is usually when you have 5 Chakra Points). The bow takes 9 posts to be full. Thats 1 D-rank chakra per post. Once it has 9 chakra points in the bow, The bow stops taking chakra. But when the bow is hit (Depending on how strong the attack is) the bow starts to stream chakra again so that it can have its full 9 chakra. The reason that they can maintain the bow is because every time you place chakra into it, It fixes itself and it looks like a new bow afterward. Also with the Arrows, Once chakra is placed into them the speed of the arrows increases and you can also control the arrow to turn left or right, or up or down. The arrowtop is also then able to almost cut throught anything. But the further away the arrow goes the harder it is to control it. Its is recomended to only place chakra in the arrow when the target is around 20-30 feet away. Maybe around 40 feet for more advanced ninjas. When the arrow is 20 feet away it takes 5 D-rank chakra points. Any further than that can be around 6-8 D-Rank chakra Points. Because the bow and arrow uses alot of chakra it is advised that Chunin and above place chakra into them.
Origin:This Bow was made Hundreds of years ago. Back when the Akasura clan where In a big conflict. Only Ten where made just like the One Daniel owns, And they where given to the most skilled warriors. The maker of these bows was a traveller, He came to the Land where the war wreaked havoc. He saw that they needed help so he offered to make these bows. But his only request was to not ask of his name, or how he made them. Around a week later he returned with the 10 bows. He soon left after he gave the bows away, And he has not been heard of since. After time 6 bows where lost and 3 remained with the town elder, And the Final bow was given to Daniels family because of how bravely they fought in battle. Each 50 years or so the bow was passed onto the grandson of each Grandfather in the family tree. Eventually it ended up in The hands of Daniel. He received it on his Thirteenth birhtday from his grandfather, who was aged 78. Soon after Daniels grandfather passed away.

Age : 28 Posts : 2538

If the bow is "thin and lightweight" I doubt "it is strong and can withstand the slash of a sword". You can't have both characteristics. Either make it heavier, or less durable.

And please be aware that even if your arrows are silent, your victims might not be; when they die. ;D

Age : 29 Posts : 62

Ok fixed. Thanks for telling me about that mistake.

Age : 31 Posts : 1118

Quote :: Special Abilities/Characteristics:It is very effective when attacking long range and it always makes quiet kills (except when the victim moans from pain). When the User is B rank they can learn how to put their Chakra inside the bow and arrows. They can put it in the Bow to make it even more stronger or put it into the arrows to make them even more deadly

Please give detail on how strong the bow is able to become and give an example of the forces that it is able to resist without breaking. Also include how adding chakra to the arrows will make it more deadly.

Please include more to your origin. Although I understand the simplicity of how you got the bow, a bit more elaboration could be squeezed in. Such things could be;

Why was the bow made?
When was the bow made?
What uses did it have to the person who made it?
Why is the wood that it came from unknown? Was it lost in your families lineage or was the wood unclassified during that time?
Who gave it to you?

Those are examples in which you could use to add to your description. Once those edits are made I see no further problems with it.

Age : 29 Posts : 62

Ok I fixed all the mistakes, I think.

Age : 31 Posts : 1118

Quote :: It is very effective when attacking long range and it always makes quiet kills (except when the victim moans from pain). When the User is B rank they can learn how to put their Chakra inside the bow and arrows. Once done the Bow can withstand almost anything, It depends on how strong the users chakra is. However the bow has a continous stream of chakra, When you have only a small bit of chakra left, the stream will break and the bow will no longer be able to withstand attacks. The reason that they can maintain the bow is because every time you place chakra into it, It fixes itself and it looks like a new bow afterward. Also with the Arrows, Once chakra is placed into them the speed of the arrows increases and you can also control the arrow to turn left or right, or up or down. The arrowtop is also then able to almost cut throught anything. But the further away the arrow goes the harder it is to control it. Its is recomended to only place chakra in the arrow when the target is around 20-30 feet away. Maybe around 40 feet for more advanced ninjas.

How much chakra does the bow drain from you each post while infusing it with chakra. I suspect D rank? If so please add that and you're good to go : )

Age : 29 Posts : 62

Done.

Age : 28 Posts : 2538

Aapproved.