Rust
Age : 29 Posts : 463
| Subject: One Boar, One Meat Mon 20 Dec 2010, 12:02 pm | |
| Character Name: Hyuuga, Risek Rank: Genin Village: Kirigakure Mission Bulletin: Mission Mission Link: Mission Topic |
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Aaron
Age : 28 Posts : 2538
| Subject: Re: One Boar, One Meat Mon 20 Dec 2010, 6:47 pm | |
| Official Grading: 1/5 + 1/5 Unofficial Grading: 5/20 Comments: I hope I'm not being harsh and I don't want this to dampen your spirits about doing missions, but take this as constructive critisism. I'm rather disappointed in this mission. Your posts were quite short, the ending of the mission was abrupt and your summoning was rather confusing. That said, let's move on to the positives. You made some good descriptions and set the scenes of you mission well, so I could imagine it well in my head, which is a good thing when it comes to roleplaying. Also, your mission wasn't boring, it was just short. In order to improve, I suggest you make your posts longer, put them through a spell checker because I did notice a few moderate grammar mistakes and try to add more description about what your character thinks and feels. I look forward to reading your next mission, Drew. Keep up the activity.
2 Mission Points Awarded.
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