Surogawa, Ka [Kirigakure Genin] (finished)

Age : 35 Posts : 1492

Hage said something about Air Scar, Basic Water control, and another jutsu. Did you Edit those accordingly? because it doesnt look like it.

Air Scar, and power blow need atleast another 2 setences of description.

Weaponry now encompasses Kenjutsu, and recieves a main weapon and a sub weapon.

Therefore it should look like this:

Main: Weaponry (Kenjutsu/something).

Age : 36 Posts : 1004

Age : 37 Posts : 1136

As requested in cbox I reviewed your app after you told me others have approved it and just needs me to finally approve it. I however find this app has not been 'done' as you keep claiming. Issue raised in the posts above havent even been corrected. I understand your new but you should not bother staff to look over your app when you havent done all the things requested.

That said I have reviewed the entire app. The following edits should be done:

Clan should be posted in full please. The link is a rather lazy way to do it

You still haven’t changed your speciality from kenjutsu to Weaponry (Main: kenjutsu, Sub: Archery)

Basic Water Control. I get the feeling this Jutsu description isn’t complete. Probably what? Please finish it and add more description about the nature of the control

Mizu Shuugou no Jutsu. How much water can this technique gather? Please state, no more then several litres I imagine given the low rank of this technique

Fearless Assault, Ka's Supprise, Pummel, Puncture should be upgraded to C rank

Puncture edit the following line as follows:

By taking a few running steps towards an opponent, the user will swing or stab their blade into the target causing lethal damage to organs

to

By taking a few running steps towards an opponent, the user will swing or stab their blade into the target more often then not causing lethal damage to organs

Power Blow needs to be rewritten. It is both confusing and rather Op for a c rank

Battojutsu should state that it cant be used to target specific points of the body given the twisting nature of it

Remove Air Scar since you link wind affinity

Bladed Death Roll edit the following line as follows:

While on the other hand puts the opponent in a critical state.

To

While on the other hand can put the opponent in a critical state.

Croc Change:

They will cut through anything that is of C rank and below.

To

They will cut through anything that is of D rank and below.

This on the basis you sword cant instantly beat weapons of the same rank

Remove from the flexibility aspect till you rank up. That trait is too powerful for a c rank weapon

Should these corrections be made I will approve the app. Do not post you are done till you have resolved each of the above issues or unless you are querying any of the above requests. Should I find out you are badgering staff to review your app when these aspects have not been dealt with I will not be pleased

Age : 36 Posts : 1004

Done ,but with little to say.

Weapon: Me taking away the extension of my blade really defeats the purpose of my character being a swordsman. That was the only ability had has far as having abilities. Also (I'm going to hate saying this) By taking that out it defeats the purpose of my Character having Bladed Death Roll Jutsu because now the sword can't even extend. What is the point of having a kenjutsu specialist if the weapon has no ability at all. (Even if I am a genin.) I don't agree with the method but i erased that part out of the app because I'm ready to do something else besides wait while other app's get approved. I'm mean even Lark C-S ranked weapon can be used for Kenetic weapon attacks and their are some genin here already with the ability to use two affenities. (Sorry Lark, I really don't have a problem with it. I just see it as I'm getting screwed.) I thought genin are only allowed 1 affenity until thei chunnin. Anyways I'm off the subject, why can't I have an extended blade when it's my characters main focus?

*Also for you who already know me this is no arguement at all. I'm just curious therefore I'm asking a question. (Please don't disrespect me in any way because I don't want to get banned again I'm not in the best of moods.)

Age : 35 Posts : 1492

You are a Genin. Therefore you must follow the Weaponry rules. C-Ranked sword is good quality, but no abilities. Keep in mind that this is a Naruto BASED Forum, not the manga itself where Genin can defeat Jounin in a single blow and the like.

As for Larks weapon, that was PART of his clan's abilities that allowd it to be used that was, the weapon itself didnt cause the Kinetic energy usage. That has such been changed as the clan has been disapproved.

Age : 36 Posts : 1004

ok so am i approved now

i did change that part

Age : 37 Posts : 1136

Still more to do. The bits in red still need doing. As stated by cara the weapon restriction applies to the general weapon rules we have on US you can update you weapon upon ranking up to be flexible as previously asked

Clan should be posted in full please. The link is a rather lazy way to do it

You still haven’t changed your speciality from kenjutsu to Weaponry (Main: kenjutsu, Sub: Archery)

Basic Water Control. I get the feeling this Jutsu description isn’t complete. Probably what? Please finish it and add more description about the nature of the control

Mizu Shuugou no Jutsu. How much water can this technique gather? Please state, no more then several litres I imagine given the low rank of this technique

Fearless Assault, ~~Ka's Supprise, Pummel, Puncture~~

Age : 36 Posts : 1004

done

I thought i hit that stuff

Posts : 191

approved.

Posts : 1044

Unapproved.

Your sword doesn't get stronger with water, not only does that not make sense but it circumvents the request that it only cut through C Rank. Remove this and then this app should be reapproved assuming you did indeed change everything you were told to change.

Age : 36 Posts : 1004

Posts : 1044

Caranore has said he wanted to look over the application, in full, a second time so no approval will be given until this has been done and the approval is given through him or through someone directed by him to do so. Please wait for his post.

Posts : 1084

Imanewbie has decided to make a new character application and no longer desires this character.

Closed and Archived.