Kinzoku Clan [Metal Manipulation]

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Subject: Re: Kinzoku Clan [Metal Manipulation] Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:46 pm

Soul wrote:: Name: Metal Tsunami
Rank: B
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 0 - 25+ meters (Close - Long)
Element: -
Description: This jutsu sends a massive amount of metal towards an opponent in the form of a wave, covering and "drowning" them in an ocean of metal. In addition to the wave effect of the jutsu, The user can control the metal, allowing him to attack his opponent while they attempt to outrun the wave. The jutsu is so powerful as to be able to change the landscape into a miniature metal wasteland. It will smother and bury any one who is caught in it, though it is quite easy to come back up from this burial.
Chakra Cost: 15

-The wording here makes it appear much stronger than it actually is. To change the entire landscape of a 25 meters+ (which in the range of the narutoverse, that is quite large), would be considered A-rank at best.

Soul wrote:: Name: Metal Armor
Rank: B
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: -
Element: -
Description: Using this jutsu, the user can cover themselves in a compacted layer of metal particles, providing an additional defense. Though quite effective, maintaining the armor requires a large amount of chakra and stamina. Furthermore, it is nowhere as resilient as the Metal Shield, since it easily breaks away upon impact, meaning that the sole purpose of the armor is to absorb impact channeled unto the body during battle. And will reduce the impact of all taijutsu and weaponary by 75% effectiveness. Another weakness is the additional weight of the metal means a decrease of speed and mobility. It takes a D rank amount of chakra PER POST to keep it activated (not counting the first post used).
Chakra Cost: 13

-List this as Close range. Also because of the effectiveness of said jutsu, I wouldn't consider it B-rank. With taijutsu and weaponry that has diminishing effects of 75%, it would be closer to A-rank at best due to it's effective nature. I can see this being effective at 50% that would encompass the B ranking. Because of that

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Subject: Re: Kinzoku Clan [Metal Manipulation] Wed 29 Jun 2011, 11:45 pm

Not that I see. 1/2

Age : 29 Posts : 269

Hmm...this is definitely a potentially deadly clan. I like it, and I look forward to seeing how its used in the future. That being said...I'll also be watching it closely for obvious reasons.

2/2

Approved.

Age : 30 Posts : 1701

Unapproved. Great clan, but I have some issues.

Quote :: Name: Weapon Creation
Rank: E - B
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: -
Element: -
Description: The users of this clan are capable of forming various weapons of different shapes and sizes. Smaller weapons do not cost as much chakra but the more detailed or larger a weapon is the more chakra it takes to not only form but compact into an actual weapon. Weapons that can be created include: shuriken (E), senbon (E), kunai (E), swords of various types (D - C), arrows(E), staff (D), spear (D), scythe (C), mallet (C), etc. *ranks labeled increase when weapon increases in size or more detail is added*
Chakra Cost: 1 - 15 (varies per rank)

This needs to state how many of each weapon can be produced per rank. Because of that, a table might be more efficient. I think this is a definite reason for unapproving, as without a defined amount of weapons, it could be abused. Not saying you would, just covering all the bases.

Quote :: Name: Metal Shield
Rank: C
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: -
Element: -
Description: This creates a curved shape wall of metal to come up from the ground around the users vacinity, the restriction is only 2 meters away from the person using it. The shield is capable of withstanding considerably strong attacks and projectiles, and can be hardened to a point where it's stronger than steel. It can be defeated by avoiding it completely with extremely high-speed attacks, or merely overcoming the shield with incredible brute force. It costs a C rank amount of chakra per shield wall created and additional C rank per post (minus the post created) to maintain the wall or else it will crumble back to metal, impacted or not.
Chakra Cost: 9

The per turn cost should be reflected under the Chakra Cost field as well, and should be based on the Average C rank Upkeep (which is 2CP per post)

How thick "Sky Metal Protective Wall" is should be reflected in the description.

Quote :: Name: Metal Tsunami
Rank: A
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 0 - 25+ meters (Close - Long)
Element: -
Description: This jutsu sends a massive amount of metal towards an opponent in the form of a wave, covering and "drowning" them in an ocean of metal. In addition to the wave effect of the jutsu, The user can control the metal, allowing him to attack his opponent while they attempt to outrun the wave. The jutsu is so powerful as to be able to change the landscape into a miniature metal wasteland. It will smother and bury any one who is caught in it, though it is quite easy to come back up from this burial.
Chakra Cost: 25

Im assuming, based on description, that this has no piercing ability?

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Age : 30 Posts : 1701

Sounds good, cept for SMPS. 2 meters thick is insane. Mild steel that thick and that large would weigh 2.4649x10^11th power kg, which is 27,170,871.5 tons. Seems a bit too much Razz

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Age : 30 Posts : 1701

mustve moved it there by accident Razz

Okay, if your chart's 'max allowed' section is based on the amount of chakra used, youre golden.

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Age : 31 Posts : 1118

Quote :: Name: Metal Suspension
Rank: B
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: -
Element: -
Description: Gathering metal particles beneath them and/or an ally, the user will create a platform of metal to raise up from the ground and float in the air. It costs a B rank amount of chakra to cast the jutsu and a D ranked amount per post afterward to sustain it over time.
Chakra Cost: 15

Add an additional post count for a B-rank technique instead of saying "D-ranks worth".

Quote :: Name: Metal Armor
Rank: B
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: -
Element: -
Description: Using this jutsu, the user can cover themselves in a compacted layer of metal particles, providing an additional defense. Though quite effective, maintaining the armor requires a large amount of chakra and stamina. Furthermore, it is nowhere as resilient as the Metal Shield, since it easily breaks away upon impact, meaning that the sole purpose of the armor is to absorb impact channeled unto the body during battle. And will reduce the impact of all taijutsu and weaponary by 50% effectiveness. Another weakness is the additional weight of the metal means a decrease of speed and mobility. It takes a D rank amount of chakra PER POST to keep it activated (not counting the first post used).
Chakra Cost: 13

Same thing.

Quote :: Name: Metal Tsunami
Rank: A
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 0 - 25+ meters (Close - Long)
Element: -
Description: This jutsu sends a massive amount of metal towards an opponent in the form of a wave, covering and "drowning" them in an ocean of metal. In addition to the wave effect of the jutsu, The user can control the metal, allowing him to attack his opponent while they attempt to outrun the wave. The jutsu is so powerful as to be able to change the landscape into a miniature metal wasteland. It will smother and bury any one who is caught in it, though it is quite easy to come back up from this burial.
Chakra Cost: 25

I assume it would be extremely difficult to swim your way up from a metal ocean without being crushed.

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Age : 31 Posts : 149

Naruto RPG

Posts : 2032

Suppose thats a 1/2 from me.

Subject: Re: Kinzoku Clan [Metal Manipulation] Thu 07 Jul 2011, 3:32 am

2/2

Approved unless stated otherwise.

Age : 31 Posts : 8965

Archived.