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ReturningYoru
Age : 34 Posts : 590
| Subject: Fox summon for Yoru done Sun 09 Dec 2012, 8:35 pm | |
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- Spoiler:
Human form
Name:Hatsue Rank:C Appearance: The youngest member of the Fox Family she is naturally smallest of all the foxes. Standing at a height of 10ft tall(Larger than normal foxes but small for the fox family summon). Her coat is a fiery red and very sleek and well groomed not a single hair on her coat of fur is out of line. The fur on her legs are a darker color of red then the rest of her fur almost as if she is wearing socks. If for some reason her fur has come out of order she will stop and preen herself to perfection. If someone messes up her fur she will hunt them down and burn them. Thanks to the fact she constantly cares for her fur it has become soft beyond all understanding. The tip of her tail is white which gives it the look of a small flame. Something she likes to show off as often as she can.Her eyes are a fire orange that seems to stand out most when she is angry. However when she is calm her eyes take a warm glow.
In her human form she takes on the look of a small child.Standing at 2'9 she takes on the average height of a four year old girl. Her tail and ears still remain sticking out since she has yet to master the transformation. Her hair she keeps the perfectly straight just as she would with her fur. Her hair starts at the normal shade of red as her fur but as it moves down it becomes lighter until it takes the white color that can bee seen on her tail. Thus giving her an interestinng hair color that attracts alot of attention. Her clothes that she decides to wear in her human form is a simple sun dress that any little girl would wear on a summer day. Even on cold days she will still wear the sundress as she is naturally warm in any weather.
Personality:Despite being the daughter of the queen, heir to the throne of fox family and only child she is a very humble individual. Though when people insult her or her family she is very quick to anger. When in the moments of this anger she attacks without hesitation or mercy. When she is with a summoner that she is very fond of she will allow them to ride on her back for a short distance. When she is talking to the people she has grown to like she will often call them Aniki(for boys) or Ane(For girls). Even though she is currently at a very young age she is very intelligent as are most Foxes. With that intelligenc as all foxes do they go out and cause mischif if they are not busy. Hatsue being a young child also has a weakness for candy. That being said when she is in human form she often goes and begs for candy and tries to look cute for humans to get what she wants. When she is around people that just rub her the wrong way she often tries to pull pranks on them, or at least make them look like a fool.
When it is brought up that she is to become the next head of the clan she changes in multiple ways. She gets excited to be in charge of something but at the same time she is absolutely terrified because of the fact she may mess up. The thought of her messing things up brings her to tears and she often runs to her mother for comfort.
Contract Type:Formal
Species:Fox
Specialty:Ninjutsu
Elemental Affinity: Katon
Summons Jutsu:
Name: Kasumi Enbu no Jutsu - Mist Waltz Technique Rank: C Type: Ninjutsu Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m) Element: Katon (Fire) Description:the user is able to create and blow a flammable gas from their lungs. Once it comes in contact with fire or sparks, the gas ignites into a large fireball.(Can be used in Fox or Human form) Chakra Cost: 8
Name:Kitsune no Hi Rank:C Type:Ninjutsu Range:0-10m Element:Katon Description: Being creatures of fire country and natural fire users their Kitsune no Hi(fox fire) is a very common jutsu for them to use. Releasing a large amount of fire from their body the create a blast all around them the closer in the opponent is the more damage the blast will do to the opponent and the surrounding area. The blast starting at where the fox stands then moves outward. At 0-5 meters the opponent will be blasted away and suffer first degree burns. From 6-10 meters the opponent will simply be launched away. Depending on how long it burns on the opponent will depend on the severity of the burns. However the fire will mostly cause first degree burns from initial burn. Chakra Cost:7
Name:Hi no Tama Rank:D Type:Ninjutsu Range:0-5m Element:Katon Description:Though it can be used as an attack it is more meant for distractions. Expelling a small ball of fire from their mouth it floats as if it were a spirit floating along. Excellent at scaring normal people or distracting shinobi it can be used in any way that the user chooses. Mostly feels warm to the touch if people get close enough to it. Chakra Cost:3
Name: Human Transformation Rank:D-A(all Foxes can use it more better than others.) Type:Ninjutsu Range:0 Element:N/A Description:All foxes have the ability to take on a Human form. Though just like how young childeren have to get good at things young foxes need to get better at transforming into a human. The youngest of foxes still retain certain fox traits such as their ears and tails. The older ones are better at hiding that they are foxes by removing their tails and ears. As well the fox is able to use certain jutsus while in human form. However because it takes so much concentration the younger foxes cant retain the form very long. As such if the fox is hurt or has to use multiple jutsus in this form they will lose it and return to fox form. However the older foxes are able to hold it longer than their younger relatives and take more damage.(C ranked 1 hit, B rank 3 hits, A rank 5 hits, S rank 7 hits) Chakra Cost:D-4(2 posts), C-7(4 posts), B-13(6 posts), A-23(8 posts)
Name: Endan - Fireball Rank: D-A Type: Ninjutsu Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m – 10m) Element: Katon (Fire) Description: Katon • Endan is a Ninjutsu technique utilizing the Fire Element. After doing the necessary hand seals, the ninja draws chakra to their lungs before swiftly exhaling it, allowing them to blow a jet of fire from their mouth. Depending on the rank at which it is performed, Endan ranges in size and heat. Starting at a moderate level of heat and a reach of up to 3m, at D rank, and increasing in temperature to an intense heat and up to a 10m reach, when performed at A rank.(Fox has to be in Human for to perform this jutsu) Chakra Cost: D: 4 (1 per post), C: 5 (2 per post), B: 12 (3 per post), A: 23 (5 per post)
Name:Hi o Rank:D Type:Ninjutsu Range:0 close range Element:Katon Description: The fox using its tail as a weapon is not usually a good idea however the foxes found a way to use it as a weapon. Lighting its tail on fire the fox can then use it to light things on fire or smack their opponent with their tail causing minor burns. Chakra Cost:3
Last edited by Yoruyamamoto on Fri 21 Dec 2012, 4:04 am; edited 9 times in total |
| | | ReturningYoru
Age : 34 Posts : 590
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Tue 11 Dec 2012, 3:08 am | |
| BUMP! |
| | | Guest
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Tue 11 Dec 2012, 5:17 am | |
| Hi, Yoru. We have a two day bump rule in regards to applications and if you need one checked, please post it in the thread that is specifically for application bumping by clicking here, instead of spamming your own topic.
Thank you. |
| | | Enzo
Age : 29 Posts : 1797
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Wed 12 Dec 2012, 3:43 am | |
| Hey, sorry for the hold up; although do be a bit patient next time Anyway, there are many things I want to go over with you about your summon. - First off; your fox transforms into a human? If so, you're going to need to set a large amount of boundaries for this. For one; it's going to require some more details. When it transforms, how long does the transformation last? What does it take to break the transformation (The E-rank Henge just takes a simple punch)? What abilities does the transformation give, if any? Why does the transformation differ with age? Can it use jutsu in this transformation? When she transforms into a human, do her dimensions stay the same (ie. stays 10ft tall)? After adding these details, I'll evaluate again whether it's proper for a simple E-rank. Also, 10ft is very large for a fox. Are you sure you're comfortable with this?
- Personality and Appearance need to be significantly longer. Just because it's not your character, doesn't mean it's not a character at all. Please go into much greater depth about the summon's personality traits and appearance; as if it were a character you were making.
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- Quote :
- Naplam
No larger than first degree burns for C-rank fire attacks, unless their only ability is to burn (which this is not, as it sticks and cannot be removed). Also not fond of the permanent sticking. State for how many posts the flame lasts. Shouldn't be more than 2. Also note that it doesn't NEED water to extinguish. Rubbing dirt on it or some other incombustible material would also stop the burning.
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- Quote :
- Kitsune no Hi
Again, no second degree burns. First degree tops. This is a C-rank jutsu remember, not a B-rank. Please also state how big this surrounding area is, how far the fire could potentially flow, and how much fire is expelled. Please be specific when making jutsu.
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- Quote :
- Hi no Tama
This shouldn't cause burns at all. It's basically a will-o-wisp. It could feel warm to the touch, but as you said, it's meant for distractions. D-rank elemental attacks are intended to be virtually useless, remember.
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- Quote :
- Human Transformation
Discussed my issues with this earlier in my post.
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- Quote :
- Hi tsume
This would be a Taijutsu technique. It also lacks any evidence that you're using Katon chakra. Why would it cause burns?
The rest appears fine. That is all for now. |
| | | ReturningYoru
Age : 34 Posts : 590
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Wed 12 Dec 2012, 7:59 pm | |
| Round 2 attempt |
| | | Enzo
Age : 29 Posts : 1797
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Thu 13 Dec 2012, 7:18 am | |
| Much better this time, though just a few nitpicks now. - Mind adding a bit more to appearance and personality? appearance namely, since you don't really go into much detail about the individual forms. A good extra paragraph would be nice. As for personality, just a bit more character depth would be appreciated.
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- Quote :
- Kitsune no Hi
The range, is it diameter, radius from the user or total surface area? This is what I meant by describing how wide of an area it can reach. If it's radius, please reduce it to 5m tops.
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- Quote :
- Human Transformation
What's the significant difference between the ranks? I assume it's the duration of the technique and how much damage the fox can take before reverting to normal state, but this isn't mentioned in the jutsu.
That is all for now. |
| | | ReturningYoru
Age : 34 Posts : 590
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Tue 18 Dec 2012, 12:32 am | |
| half hearted bump |
| | | ReturningYoru
Age : 34 Posts : 590
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Thu 20 Dec 2012, 8:50 pm | |
| OVER 2 DAY BUMP! |
| | | Cookie Monster
Age : 29 Posts : 4301
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Thu 20 Dec 2012, 11:40 pm | |
| Please stop bumping your topics. If you wish to gain the attention of Staff, post here.
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| | | Enzo
Age : 29 Posts : 1797
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Fri 21 Dec 2012, 3:51 am | |
| Sorry for the wait. - Quote :
- Human Transformation
You'll need to elaborate the significant advantage of using it at higher rank. As in, how much longer, how much more believable is the transformation, and how much more damage can the "older" fox take? - Quote :
- Kitsune no Hi
You haven't modified anything here.. or I'm just delusional. What I'm looking for is a specific range for the attack. As in, exact meters described; and whether it's diametric, radial or volume. The rest is fine. |
| | | ReturningYoru
Age : 34 Posts : 590
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Fri 21 Dec 2012, 4:05 am | |
| Edited Enzo |
| | | Enzo
Age : 29 Posts : 1797
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Fri 21 Dec 2012, 4:28 am | |
| Seems okay. Approved for Training |
| | | Cookie Monster
Age : 29 Posts : 4301
| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done Wed 24 Apr 2013, 10:07 am | |
| Archived. Due to inactivity.
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| Subject: Re: Fox summon for Yoru done | |
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