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| Shinzui Koori [ready for check] | |
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Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:43 pm | |
| Basic Information: Name: Shinzui Koori Secondary Title: Frostbite Age: 16 Gender: Male Physical Appearance:
Shinzui has white, hair because of his father "Kurou kaguya". He styles his hair back with one bang of hair over his forehead. Because he is a cross breed of both Koori and kaguya, he has a powerfull, muscular body and alot of Kaguya characteristics like a short fuse and white hair with dark eyes. He is about 168 cm tall and weighs 52.2 kg.
Shinzui always wears his sleeveless, leather body armor in combination with tight, black pants. He has no sleeves on his shirt because they restrict his movements when he swings his sword, It also shows his powerfull arms. He wears fingerless, brown leather gloves and brown leather boots. Also, he wears his Yamato on his left side and the Ryuken on his back.
Personality: Shinzui is very cold towards most people around him and does not wish to be around people. In Shinzui's childhood, his only friend died. Since that day, he never bother making new friends, knowing they would just die on him like his friend. Shinzui takes alot of pride in his ability's of controlling ice and attacking with swords at the same time.
In his eyes, the sick and weak should just die and be put out of their missery. He doesnt care alot about his clans status in the village and also doesnt care much for village. All he truly cares about are his swords and himself. Because he is a cross breed of Kaguya and Koori blood, he gained some CHaracteristics of the kaguya clan, while having the Koori bloodlike limit. The day that his Kaguya father died, he became alot more ruthless and merciless towards people.
Shinzui's main objective in life is to do something to earn respect, since he doesnt think that being respected because of your background is true respect. His second objective is to become the greatest swordsman in the shinobi world.
Catch Phrase: "You're not even worth killing" "Just give up, you've allready lost" "Pathetic"
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 2:53 pm; edited 9 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:43 pm | |
| Clan Name: Koori (Haku's Clan/ All Ice Jutsu)
Clan Location: Kiri
Clan Traits: -
*Must have Water and Wind As elements
Kekkei Genkai: The Bloodline limit of the Koori clan is purely elemental. This meaning that they are one of the few ninja in the world that on top of the regular elements that all ninja have an opportunity of access to, they can also access a singular advanced element. All members of this clan have the basic elements of wind and water. They can combine the properties and fundamentals of both to create the ice element. This is done by the wind chakras adding a chilled factor to the water chakras, causing it become an over all colder chakra. When exuded from the body, its heat level is to low to be liquefied water, and instead takes the form of solid ice.
All of their clan jutsu focus around this singular concept of creating and manipulating ice. A user is capable of taking pre-existing bodies of water, large or small, and manipulating them into ice, as well as pre-existing ice formations and using them for their techniques. This ice is generally very durable and difficult to break, taking an excessive amount of physical damage for most techniques, and is also, in contradiction to naturally occurring ice, displays a resistance to fire, though is not purely immune to it its melting effects.
Secret Clan Jutsu:
Name: Demonic Ice Crystal Mirrors Type: Ninjutsu Rank: B Element: Ice Description: Using their kekkei genkai, Koori members can create a dome of twenty-one mirrors made out of ice to trap an opponent. Twelve remain at ground level, eight are placed above the first twelve and angled toward the ground, and the final mirror is above the rest and facing the ground. They can then enter one of the mirrors and instantly transport to another mirror. While moving about he bombards the opponent with attacks at very high speeds, such that the rest of the world appear to be moving in slow motion compared to him. If the mirror the user is in is broken, they can leap out of one of the fragments and continue their attack or move to another mirror. The technique requires a large amount of chakra to maintain, so Their movement becomes progressively slower the longer they maintains the mirrors. Roughly a B ranked amount every two posts. Though they are made from ice, the mirrors are imbued with enough chakra to resist fire almost completely
Name: Ice Disk Technique Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This jutsu turns the moisture particles in the air into an ice disk. They can be hurled with tremendous force at a target and are hard to dodge because of their transparency. They can also be strung together to spy on areas. They can also be used defensively, creating highly durable shields or disks to stand on to hover in the air.
Name: Ice Prison Technique Type: Ninjutsu Rank: B Element: Ice Description: This technique requires the user to use either water from underground which they can bring up, ice underground which they can bring up, or water in the air in a highly saturated environment. If using water as a source it will cost an extra D rank amount of chakra due to having to freeze it first. The user can then trap their opponent within the ice by controlling its movements and completely surrounding them in the ice. This jutsu is strong enough to withstand basic fire jutsu, because the ice has already been infused with the user's chakra. This allows this jutsu to double as a defensive technique, by the user encasing themselves in the ice.
Name: Ice Release: One Horned White Whale Type: Ninjutsu Rank: A Element: Ice Description: This jutsu allows the user to create a humongous whale, the size of a small island, out of ice to attack their opponent. The user needs a source of ice or water in order to use this technique. This jutsu is used more as a distraction technique, or to block an opponents movements, because of its size. If using water will take an extra C rank amount to freeze the vast supply into ice.
Name: Ice Release: Swallow Snow Storm Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This jutsu creates a cluster of ice needles in the shape of miniature swallows, which the user then throws at the opponent. These needles can change direction in midair and will maim the opponent with their sharp wings.
Name: Ice Release: Tearing Dragon Fierce Tiger Type: Ninjutsu Rank: B Element: Ice Description: his jutsu allows the user to create a giant tiger made out of ice. The user needs a nearby source of ice or water in order to use this jutsu. When using water an extra C rank amount of chakra is needed to freeze it for the technique. This jutsu is cold enough to freeze any Water Release techniques it comes into contact with.
Name: Ice Release: Ice Spikes Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This justu unleashes great spikes of ice that come out from the users body. They cannot be specifically controlled and are not for attack, strictly defense for a quick and uncontrolled technique. They do not bear any resistance to fire as some other Koori Ice jutsu do. The Ice created from this can be further used for other Ice techniques as well. This defense is fairly weak and can be shattered with the simplest of techniques of almost any kind only being able to turn aside the most basic taijutsu (simple punches and kicks with no chakra added), and basic weaponary (simple nonenhanced metal or wooden weapons with no added chakra capabilities.)
History: The Koori clan are The Mist Villages second most well known clan as its co-founder and unique ability to manipulate and create the ice element. In the time before the great villages were constructed they were one of the lesser clans for hire but they were still well known all the same and held a certain level of respect and honor. Unlike the accursed Kaguya clan they are actually quite peaceful by nature though quite deadly in battle. Despite there grand foothold in the society of Kiri, they at one point, just like the Kaguya were persecuted by the normal villagers for there arcane abilities which were beyond what normal shinobi could do. There faith in the village never wavered though, and unlike the Kaguya, they never struck back against there critics.
When the Kaguya rebellion came to pass, they led the resistance to the struggle and were the main cause for the ending of the feud. As a result of this they single handedly brought their village closer together and ended the persecution, the two clans gaining more respect and stature then ever before amongst their home. For many years they have served as the primary protectors of the village and its most well known family name.
Clan Details: Open
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 3:15 pm; edited 4 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:43 pm | |
| Rank Information:
Rank: Genin [C rank] Village Affiliation: Kumogakure no sato
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 3:26 pm; edited 3 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:44 pm | |
| Special Information: Character Speciality: Main: Weaponry Sub: Ninjutsu
Weaponry speciality: Main: Swords Sub: Ranged
Elemental Affinity: Main: Suiton Sub: Fuuton [not yet learned]
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 4:40 pm; edited 6 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:45 pm | |
| Special Characteristics:
Able Bodied Shinzui is in excellent physical shape. He heals quickly and is seldom ill. He had gained this through daily practice with his grandfather and his senpai "Mangetsu". His grandfather thought that his great stamina came from him being part Kaguya.
Ruthless Shinzui doesnt have to think twice when having to kill someone. Because all people that where truly important to him either died or left him, he isnt very emotional anymore. To that extent, he wont hessitate to kill an enemy or someone standing in his way. This is also something that he might have gained because of his part Kaguya blood.
Ambidextrous Shinzui is equally adept at using either hand. Although ambidexterity is rare at birth, it can be learned. Most duelists spend their whole lives refining this talent. He spent alot of time to master this because he was dead set on using both swords to their fullest.
Photographic Memory Shinzui remembers everything he sees and hears with absolute clarity. Since he has been drawing and sketching alot, he tought himself to memorize whatever beautifull thing he sees so he can draw it later. He also used this to create ice skulpture's.
Last edited by vergil on Mon 26 Apr 2010, 8:15 pm; edited 5 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:45 pm | |
| Academy Jutsu
- Spoiler:
Name: Kawarimi no Jutsu Rank: E Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: This jutsu lets the user quickly switch places with another nearby object, such as a plant (normally a section of a log), an animal, or even another person within reach, leaving the opponent open to a counter-attack. Explosive tags can be attached to the replacement for an added surprise. Fundamentally, all ninja know this technique.
Name: Ayatsuito no Jutsu - String Reeling Technique Rank: N/A Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: Ayatsuito no Jutsu is a Ninjutsu technique utilizing wire. This string can be used in rappeling, or as a method to tie down and restrict the movement of an opponent.
Name: Henge no Jutsu Rank: E Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: This jutsu allows the user to assume the appearance of another person, animal, or object. This is one of the basic jutsu taught at the Konoha Ninja Academy. Fundamentally, all ninja know this jutsu. The transformation jutsu is considered to be among the more difficult E-ranked techniques, since it requires constant emission of chakra while mentally maintaining the form. On top of that, the user would be, most likely, interacting with the environment. This puts much mental strain on the inexperienced ninja.
Name: Bunshin no Jutsu Rank: E Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: This technique creates intangible copies of the user. The clones are simply illusions and will dissipate when they come into contact with something. The illusions can be seen through by the Byakugan and the Sharingan. A person with normal eyes can also distinguish the clones from the original, since the clones will not disrupt the area around themselves with their movement (won't kick up dust, crush grass, etc.).
Name: Nawanuke no Jutsu Rank: E Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: A basic jutsu taught at the Konoha Ninja Academy, this jutsu allows a ninja to free themselves if they have been tied up.
Name: Genjutsu Kai Rank: E-S Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: Kai is a Ninjutsu technique which allows the ninja to avoid the effects of a Genjutsu illusion. After forming the needed handseals, the Genjutsu technique will not affect the ninja. The ninja can also use the technique on another individual who was unable to avoid the attack. After forming the needed hand seals, the ninja touches the one affected to end the affect of the spell.
Name: Shunshin no Jutsu Rank: D-S Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: This jutsu is a high-speed movement technique, allowing a ninja to move short to long distances at an almost untraceable speed. To an observer, it appears as if the user has teleported. A puff of smoke is occasionally used to disguise the user's movements. It is accomplished by using chakra to temporarily boost the user's reflexes. The amount of chakra required depends on the overall distance between the user and their intended destination.
Name: Kinobori no Waza - Act of Tree Climbing Rank: N/A Type: Ninjutsu/Chakra Control Element: N/A Description: Kinobori no Waza, the art of tree climbing serves a dual purpose. Taking part in Kinobori Shugyou (Tree Climbing Training) helps a ninja learn how to focus their chakra. It also teaches the ninja how to run up trees and walk on vertical walls. The training helps the ninja learn how to focus just the right amount of chakra to a particular part of their body. The amount needed to climb is small but it must be precise. The feet are regarded as the hardest location to master chakra focusing. So by gaining the art of this skill, the ninja will have any jutsu available (theoretically) because they will be able to focus their chakra as needed.
Name: Suimen Hokou no Waza - Act of Water Surface Walking Rank: N/A Type: Ninjutsu/Chakra Control Element: N/A Description: A variation on the Kinobori no Waza (Act of Tree Climbing), the art of water surface walking allows a ninja to walk on water as if it was a solid surface. Focusing an even amount of chakra out of the soles of their feet, they can balance themselves on the very surface of the water.
Name: Bikou Ninjutsu - Shadowing Stealth Technique Rank: E Type: Ninjutsu Element: N/A Description: Bikou Ninjutsu is the technique ninjas use to follow their targets covertly. The manner in which the ninja shadows their target can differ, from the basic hiding under a nearby object, to using a jutsu to turn oneself invisible. In vergils case, he will hide under cloth that looks like dirt and sand.
Clan jutsu:
- Spoiler:
Name: Ice Disk Technique Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This jutsu turns the moisture particles in the air into an ice disk. They can be hurled with tremendous force at a target and are hard to dodge because of their transparency. They can also be strung together to spy on areas. They can also be used defensively, creating highly durable shields or disks to stand on to hover in the air.
Name: Ice Release: Swallow Snow Storm Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This jutsu creates a cluster of ice needles in the shape of miniature swallows, which the user then throws at the opponent. These needles can change direction in midair and will maim the opponent with their sharp wings.
Name: Ice Release: Ice Spikes Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This justu unleashes great spikes of ice that come out from the users body. They cannot be specifically controlled and are not for attack, strictly defense for a quick and uncontrolled technique. They do not bear any resistance to fire as some other Koori Ice jutsu do. The Ice created from this can be further used for other Ice techniques as well. This defense is fairly weak and can be shattered with the simplest of techniques of almost any kind only being able to turn aside the most basic taijutsu (simple punches and kicks with no chakra added), and basic weaponary (simple nonenhanced metal or wooden weapons with no added chakra capabilities.)
Clan jutsu (custom):
- Spoiler:
Name: Ice Release: Ice shuriken Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This jutsu turns the moisture particles in the air into shuriken of ice. The jutsu forms about 10-12 shuriken that hover around him for a few seconds before launching themselves at the enemy target. This jutsu isnt used by making handseals, but by raising his index and middle finger to form the shurkien, and then pointing the two fingers at a target to fire them. These are not as powerfull as the metal shuriken, thought they can do alot of damage to a human body and can counter other projectiles.
Name: Ice Release: Path of frost Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: Any Koori clan member can learn this jutsu after they have learned to use Kinobori no waza and Suimen no waza. The Koori clan member focuses his chakra into his feet to walk on water, but instead of using regular chakra, they will use their bloodline limit's Ice chakra to freeze the water on wich they are standing. This can then be used to walk on without the use of chakra and be used for ice based jutsu.
Suiton jutsu:
- Spoiler:
Name: Mizu Bunshin no Jutsu - Water Clone Technique Rank: C Type: Ninjutsu Element: Suiton Description: Mizu Bunshin no Jutsu is a Ninjutsu technique that utilizes water to create a Bunshin clone. Unlike a normal Bunshin, the Mizu Bunshin has the ability to interact more with the environment due to it having physical substance. This allows the clone to carry out limited attacks on its target. The range of the clone is limited however; it can not travel very far from the original body. If the Mizu Bunshin is injured, the clone will usually revert back into its natural water state.
Name: Mizu Shuugou no Jutsu Rank: C Type:Ninjutsu Element: Suiton Description: This jutsu allows the user to gather water from the environment around him, like from the air, soil, etc. However, if in dry lands, this jutsu is useless.
Name: Suirou no Jutsu - Water Prison Technique Rank: C Type: Ninjutsu Element: Suiton Description: Suirou no Jutsu is a Ninjutsu technique that utilizes water to imprison an opponent. The ninja forms the necessary hand seals which causes the water to form around the target into a spherical prison which only allows for limited movement. The ninja must keep their body touching the water prison to maintain its existence. If the contact is broken, the water falls away and their target is released. When combined with a bunshin technique, the ninja can imprison their target but still allow for a clone to attack others nearby.
Name: Hahonryuu - Destruction Torrent Rank: C - S Type: Ninjutsu Element: Suiton Description: Suiton • Hahonryuu is a Ninjutsu technique utilizing the Water Element. To use this technique Yamato will generate water to use against his opponent. Depending on the amount of chakra put into the technique is how much water will be generated.
Kenjutsu (Custom):
- Spoiler:
Name: kiri zanzou higyou - mist afterimage strike Rank: c Type: taijutsu/ninjutsu Element: - Description: after using the hidden mist jutsu, shinzui will use bunshin to make it look like multiple shinzui are running in circles around their enemy. and when it is least expected, multiple shinzui will attack from various sides. this can be performed with regular bunshin or solid bunshin. Rp sample: when inside the mist, shinzui formed about four clones around him. then he started running in circles around his enemy. because of the low visibility, the other clones running with shinzui made it look like shinzui moved so incredibly fast that he was leaving afterimage's. then he suddenly turned to face his enemy while he and his clones jumped from a different direction and onto the other combatant.
Name: Gen'ei sanjuu higyou - illusion triple strike Rank: D Type: Kenjutsu/ninjutsu Element: - Description: Shinzui will make two bunshin and rush to his enemy from three sides. being distracted by three shinzui it will be hard to block/find the actual shinzui before it is too late. this can be used with solid clones to make the attack more lethal. rp sample: while performing the handseals, two clones appeared by shinzui's side. as they all attacked from a different angle his opponent had a hard time finding out wich was the real one. as the kick got trough, shinzui grabbed his sword and cut the man's tendon's while the man was distracted.
Name: Mizu kakushu higyou - Water Beheading strike Rank: C Type: Kenjutsu/ninjutsu Element: - Description: Shinzui will hide and use one or two Mizu bunshin to attack their enemy with sword attacks or mizurappa. By knocking the opponent of their feet or distracting the opponent, the real Shinzui will move from the opponents blindspot and kill his enemy by chopping of their head or anything within reach.
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 4:06 pm; edited 13 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:45 pm | |
| Name: Ryuken Quantity: The only one Rank: C rank, B-S once the ninja learns to channel their chakra through it. Appearance: The Ryuken sword has a black Saya (scabard), a golden Tsuba (guard) and a red Ito (braid) around it's Tsuka (handle). It's blade is 0.90 meters long. Special Abilities/Characteristics: The Ryuken sword has the ability to channel chakra. [Chuunin or higher]. Origin: The Ryuken sword once belonged to Vergil's best friend and Senpai Mangetsu Koori. When Mangetsu got murdered on a mission, his squad members took the sword with them and gave it to the Koori clan head. When Shinzui heard the bad news, he rushed to the clan head. The clans head was called Hokuto, and was Shinzui grandfather. Knowing how close the two where, he decided to grant Shinzui permission in having the sword.
Name: Yamato Quantity: The only one Rank: C rank, B-S once the ninja learns to channel their chakra through it. Appearance: The Yamato sword has a black Saya (scabard), a golden Tsuba (guard) and a white Ito (braid) around it's Tsuka (handle). It's blade is 0.90 meters long. Special Abilities/Characteristics: The Yamato sword has the ability to channel chakra. [Chuunin or higher]. Origin: After he finished his Academy and his Kenjutsu training, his grandfather became very ill. Teaching him one last lesson in how to take the fullest out of sketching, he died at the age of 89. Having lost yet another person close to him, he took his grandfather's sword and started training himself till his body couldnt take the strain anymore. Repeating the same marathon every day, he tought himself how to become ambidextrous and how to wield both sword with evenly matched accurace and power.
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 2:24 pm; edited 12 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:45 pm | |
| Items carried
Name: Kunai Amount: 10x
Name: steel wire Amount: 2 meters
Name: Explosive tags Amount: 5x
Name: Smoke bombs Amount: 4x
Name: World map Amount: 1x
Name: Flare's Amount: 3x
Name: Mangetsu's Bingo book Amount: 1x
Name: Bottle of soda Amount: 1x
Last edited by vergil on Mon 26 Apr 2010, 7:11 pm; edited 5 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:46 pm | |
| Background Information History: Birth arc: sixteen years ago, a beautifull child was born into the Koori family. He was the grandson of the clan leader and his father was a noble teacher of the Kirigakure academy. After a few weeks, baby Shinzui got his first presents from his grandfather. He got a kendo stick for future practice, and a scroll possesing the clan secret jutsu, so he could start his studies when he was the right age.
Every day of the week, a young boy named Mangetsu came to see the noble grandson. He watched with joy how the baby tried to crawl out of his crib, and then being picked up and layed back in bed by his mother. Time after time, the baby kept on trying to bust out of his crib, never succeeding, but never giving up.
Academy arc: At the age of eight, Shinzui started his kenjutsu training with his grandfather at the same time as he entered the academy. Because of his youthfull body and his young, but smart way of thinking, he quickly learned to fight with a sword and score A's at the academy. Because of his smart and a bit arrogant attitude, alot of boys wanted to take it outside very often. Though they where actually more intimidated then willing to fight, a real fight never came to be.
The first skill Shinzui learned was one he completely mastered at the age of 12, the body flicker technique. Vergil was quite skilled at using it at his young age, and had no problem in combining it with kenjutsu moves. It was at his 9th birthday that Shinzui learned to create his own technique's using Shunshin and kenjutsu. When Shinzui finished the academy a year earlier then the other kids, his grandfather and he spent even more time practicing kenjutsu. Learning various combinations from the basic combat stance, Shinzui became quite the prodigy of the clan and now had a reputation to live up to.
He had alot personal practice with his Senpai "Mangetsu" when they where free from school and missions. Vergil was by far the most talented of the young clan members, but they where good friends and close family.
Early genin arc: When he had got his headband, alot of things went wrong in the family. His best friend and senpai "Mangetsu" died on a mission, his grandfather died of an illness and his biological father was killed for trying to steal medicine from the feudal lord. It was then that he found out that his real father was not Koori, but kaguya.
Because of the deaths of people close to him or important to him, he left home for a few weeks and started a ruthless training program. He was dead set on becoming a skilled warrior with both swords he had gotten from his Grandfather and Senpai. After a few weeks of training, he had learned how to use both the Ryuken and the Yamato at the same time.
Returning home, his attitude had changed alot. He no longer cared for the village that had caused his Senpai to die, he didnt care for the Koori family that just stood by while his real father got killed and for not being able to save his grandfather. Once a happy, childish and arrogant kid, he had now become a cold, murderous, hollow shell of his former self. Because of his newly born hatred for the village and the clan, Shinzui now resides within Kumogakure. Having spent the money he got from his birthdays and his inheritance from his grandfather and Mangetsu, he bought a mansion in Kumogakure.
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 4:19 pm; edited 5 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 12:46 pm | |
| Normal:
- Spoiler:
Having been brought into the hidden leaf village, Shinzui had made his way to the hospital with the help of adair. Checking in into the hospital, he immidiatly got assigned to a bed and was forced to stay in d for atleast a week. Having burn wounds, deep cuts and a few broken bones, he was laying in bed like a corpse. Because of his bloodline, the bones where healing themselves a little bit, but his other wounds didnt do that as easily.
"I wish someone would come to see me, it is so boring if you are all alone.. laying in an empty hospital room. But yea, what did you expect from a healthy village with good health care.
Simply staring out of the window next to him, he was looking out on the village. Thinking that it didnt resemble Kirigakure at all, he was hoping to check it all out once he got out of the hospital. But untill then, he had to wait until he was released from his bed
Advanced:
- Spoiler:
Once again, it was a late at night as vergil was laying in his bed. Seeing his family surrounding him, he saw everyone laughing at him for a moment. Then the faces suddenly looked at him and started crying and screaming in agony as they suddenly caught fire. "You did this to us Vergil, you where too late"
"Gahh...., Another nightmare" Vergil mumbled while rudely waking up from a nightmare. Getting up, he drank the last sip of milk from the pack standing next to his bed. For a moment, Vergil was calm as he stared at the stars and the moon. His hopes of falling asleep where quickly dealt with by the sound of the crickets outside. A moment later, he was starting to wake up and thought to himself, "If i cant fall asleep, then i might aswell take a walk. Damn crickets".
Slowly walking down the stairs and the basement, he opened the frontdoor and walked outside into the mountains. Leaping from rock to rock, he quickly made his way down to the village. Jumping from the last rock onto a nearby roof, he slided down from a ledge and walked on the main street of iwagakure. Since it was late, most fair people had allready gone to bed and some homeless people where seen sometimes. "I think i am going to take a walk outside the village" he thought to himself while walking towards the gate.
Suddenly sensing another presence in the vacinity and hearing cracking sounds of rock as if someone was walking on it. Noticing that the sounds came from above him, he channeled chakra to his feet and ran up the wall to get up there in a matter of seconds. Hearing the door of the tower closing, he grabbed the handle and opened the door. Seeing someone at the window staring outside, Vergil calmly slowly walked into the room and let the man know that he had arrived. "Who are you, and why are you in here this late", he asked calm as he kept a close eye on the man.
PS: My posts length depend on how much i have to say to someone, how much they tell me and have to respond to and to whatever i am going to do next.
Last edited by vergil on Tue 27 Apr 2010, 2:42 pm; edited 2 times in total |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Mon 26 Apr 2010, 8:33 pm | |
| Completion Bump |
| | | CYANIDE CANDY
Posts : 1084
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Tue 27 Apr 2010, 12:33 am | |
| Appearance needs to be longer.
Also, the minimum length for an rp at genin level is 150 words. So, your 'simple' rp cannot be used here.
Your app is also somewhat difficult to read. You should try forming longer paragraphs made of five or six sentences. |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Tue 27 Apr 2010, 2:21 pm | |
| - Çγαηide Çαηdγ ♥ wrote:
- Appearance needs to be longer.
Also, the minimum length for an rp at genin level is 150 words. So, your 'simple' rp cannot be used here.
Your app is also somewhat difficult to read. You should try forming longer paragraphs made of five or six sentences. I understand, the simple one was when i am completely out of words or dunno how to respond. In this case, it was the ending post of a topic ^^
Appearance is being lengthened asap
and i will try to fix reading difficulty ^^ |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Tue 27 Apr 2010, 2:53 pm | |
| Fixed |
| | | Caranore
Age : 35 Posts : 1492
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Tue 27 Apr 2010, 3:13 pm | |
| Kenjutsu falls under weaponry.
Weaponry: Main:Kenjutsu Sub: Exotic (or something. that is just an example. Refer to weaponry guides for more details)
Please ensure you copied to clan template we provided. there is a spoiler at the end of the Koori clan post with the code. Please use that because it includes he secret clan jutsu in the code. |
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Tue 27 Apr 2010, 4:19 pm | |
| Fixed that aswell
Since alot of Koori jutsu rely on present ice, i made these two custom ice jutsu.
Name: Ice Release: Ice shuriken Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: This jutsu turns the moisture particles in the air into shuriken of ice. The jutsu forms about 10-12 shuriken that hover around him for a few seconds before launching themselves at the enemy target. This jutsu isnt used by making handseals, but by raising his index and middle finger to form the shurkien, and then pointing the two fingers at a target to fire them. These are not as powerfull as the metal shuriken, thought they can do alot of damage to a human body and can counter other projectiles.
Name: Ice Release: Path of frost Type: Ninjutsu Rank: C Element: Ice Description: Any Koori clan member can learn this jutsu after they have learned to use Kinobori no waza and Suimen no waza. The Koori clan member focuses his chakra into his feet to walk on water, but instead of using regular chakra, they will use their bloodline limit's Ice chakra to freeze the water on wich they are standing. This can then be used to walk on without the use of chakra and be used for ice based jutsu.
tell me what you think. If these are okey, then i think i am pretty much done. |
| | | Hugh
Age : 37 Posts : 1136
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Wed 28 Apr 2010, 12:43 pm | |
| Looks Good. I hereby grant you the ....
|
| | | Hiruzen
Age : 32 Posts : 1178
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Wed 28 Apr 2010, 12:44 pm | |
| hehe Seal
thanks Hugh ^^ |
| | | Adam
Age : 31 Posts : 8965
| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] Fri 02 Jul 2010, 9:36 am | |
| Archived due to User Inactivity. |
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| Subject: Re: Shinzui Koori [ready for check] | |
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