Red Leaf Poison and it's Antidote [Complete]

Age : 30 Posts : 66

Poison Name: niirodokuha (Red Poison Leaf)
Rank: C rank
Poison Description:
Solid State:In a solid state the Red Poison Leaf, is a red colored leaf that looks like this, but the poison only works if the user dries out the leaf. The leaf must be dried out until it is completely blood red and very crunchy before the poison is usable.
Liquid State:In a liquid state this is a red hue nectar that looks a lot like blood. The liquid is created from a fresh leaf that is grated and then mushed until a red liquid begins to come out. This red liquid comes out oily but when left out in the sunlight for a day it become a nectar.
Gaseous State:The leaf must be burn in order to create a gaseous state, this intensifies the effect but reduces the chance for infection. The leaf burns red instead of black making it easy to tell from normal smoke.

Poison Effect(s):
[ Post 0 / Turn of Infection/Injection (Solid)If the user brushes up against the leaf, they will feel itching at the point of contact. (Liquid) The point of entry will sting more than usual and a rash an inch in diameter forms on the skin nearby. (Gas) When inhaled user will start to fell a shortness of breath, and itching all around the body where the gas is touching the infected person's body.]

[ Post 1 / Effect (Solid) User begins to get a rash at point of contact(even inside if digested), this rash is approximately an inch large in diameter. (Liquid) The rash spreads further to be 3 inches in diameter. (Gas) shortness of breath continues and muscles start shivering, itching becomes more severe, but will not spread inside the infected.]

[ Post 2 / Effect (Solid) Muscles in the area of contact begin to start shivering, and the itch stays the same at an inch in diameter(Liquid) Itching spreads even further to 9 inches, Muscles in the area of where the poison begin to shiver(Gas) Shortness of breath continues, Muscles shiver slightly more violent, and itching is limited to the outside of the body.]

[ Post 4 / Effect (Solid) Muscles all over the infected person's body are shivering slightly stronger, no change to the itch as it is still an inch in diameter. (Liquid) All of the infected person's muscles are shivering, but the itch hasn't changed and is still 9 inches in diameter. (Gas) Shortness of breath, the person in now shivering violently and movement is difficult. and the itch is all over the body and starts to form on the infected person's lips]

[ Post 6 / Effect (Solid) The infected person's muscles are now shivering violently and unable to move very well, the itch has not changed and is still an inch in diameter. (Liquid) The itch remains contained in a 9 inch diameter, and the infected person's muscles are shivering and have a limited range of movement.(Gas) The itch spreads to the infected person's tongue making their whole body, lips and tongue itchy. The infected person find it harder to breathe than normal.]

[ Post 10 / Effect (Solid) The person is capable of movement again, but is not capable of doing fast movements and all of the infected person's muscles are sore. The itch begins to recede to half an inch diameter. (Liquid) The infected person is capable of moving every part of their body to the full potential, except the limb attached to where the poison was injected, the rash begins to recede to a 5 inch diameter.(Gas) The user is capable of slight movements, but is sore all over their body. Itching remains all over the person's body and the shortness of breath begins to worsen to almost suffocation.]

[ Post 20 / Effect (Solid) The itching is completely gone and all muscles are normal (Liquid) The limb where the poison was injected is numb and the itching is now gone. (Gas) If the infected didn't leave the gas from the tenth post, then the would now suffocate to death dying the next post even if they leave. If the person left during post 10-13 then the effects begin to subside completely. If the person left during posts 14-18 then they are still itchy over most of their body, have a slight shortness of breath, but their tongue and lips are not itchy. If they left in post 19 then they still have all symptoms of post 10, but will not get any worse and in 3 posts will begin to feel normal again. ]

Note: Gaseous is the most lethal, but also the easiest to escape from.

Name: Red Leaf Antidote
Rank: C
Type: Medicine
Natural Abilities: This is the antidote to the niirodokuha poison and acts fast relieving all symptoms in 2 posts. The first symptom relieved is shortness of breath, if it has taken place. The second symptom relieved is the paralysis, this includes the muscles stiffening. The final thing that would be relieved would be welts and rashes caused by the poison. This can act as a pre-emptive medicine against the poison and will last for 5 posts not allowing any symptoms from the Red Leaf to take effect.

Posts : 1044

Space out the effects here, its very difficult to read as it is.

Age : 30 Posts : 66

should be easier to read now

Posts : 1044

The actual poison may come from a leaf but thats not what it is, the description of it should be what the poison appears and acts like when it is in its pure state and removed from whatever substance it originates from.

Also, the descriptions in this are rather short, try detailing and lengthening them.

Age : 30 Posts : 66

detail added if you need more... I need more ideas or something >.<

also I'm not sure what you need for physical description

Age : 30 Posts : 66

bump after 3 days of no checking =_="

Posts : 2032

Keep in mind that you are a genin and C-ranked. A C-ranked poison would not have such intensive effects as these. You would need to focus only in one area e.g the itching and then have a small effect (near the end of your post length) in another area like your muscles. The effect of completely stiffening the opponents muscular system making them unable to move is a very lethal poison, something that would be reserved for a higher rank. You would only have small effects of this in a C-rank poison e.g weakness and shivering in the muscles. Please edit accordingly.

Age : 30 Posts : 66

I reduced symptoms from stiffening muscles to making them shiver violently at turn 6 (except gas which is turn 4)

Age : 30 Posts : 66

Posts : 191

If you don't mind, for a poison such as this, dosages would be nice. For instance, if you only get a drop in their blood, at C-rank that wouldn't do much, but how does that compare to 40 ml's? etc, just so the afflicted knows based on the amount of poison they've taken in how they should cause their character to react. Also, I feel that logically liquid form would be more potent than gas, as gas is more dispersed and less concentrated than a liquid, and is easier to inflict upon the target.

Posts : 1084

Archived.