Abhorsen Clan

Posts : 54

Clan Name:Abhorsen
Location:Konoha
Signature Traits:Clan members only use Genjutsu as it has been forbidden to learn anything else since this will hinder the power of the Abhorsen Genjutsu. The jutsu are carried out with the aid of 7 bells carried on a bell bandoleer without these bells the genjutsu would not work as they are all sound based, an Abhorsen can whistle their genjutsu but they are not nearly as powerful.
Kekkei Genkai:N/A
History:The Abhorsen clan come from lands unknown and long forgotten. At first there was only one Abhorsen he was pure evil and used his power to do evil enslaving other ninja for his own use but after his son was born he changed seeing that bringing his son up was far more important that trying to rule over others, he instead used his power to save the land from evil.

The Abhorsen clan never had a place to call home they were nomads wandering all over never resting. Their numbers were always just four Abhorsen, no more and no less, when another Abhorsen was to be born the eldest of the four would commit suicide making their final walk into death. Abhorsens see death in a different way than other people, they see it as a long river divided into 9 sections each section different from the rest, when someone dies they take their final walking to death and beyond the 9th gate to their final resting place

Each section has a different look, feel and gate.

Death In depth
1st Gate:The river in the first section is fairly strong and very cold but only if you dont pay attention, darkness surrounds you on all side and it isn't possible to tell how far the river runs left or right, the sound of a powerful flowing water can be heard constantly. As you approach the gate the sound makes sense the gate itself is a huge waterfall the current of the river is vastly more powerful and grabs souls and spits them out the other side of the waterfall.

2nd Gate:The current in here is deadly and can easily pull you along if you are not careful along with that are pitfall and holes all the way along, only one who has walked death many times knows the way, the gate at the end of this section is a vast hole that the water flows into.

3rd Gate:The third section seems as though its was quite peaceful, the river is quite warm, the current is but a trickle but this is all to throw people off guard, huge waves inhabit this section strong enough to sweep people on their feet and along straight to the ninth gate. The gate itself is an a still mirror like water.

4th Gate:This section is bright and thin and the current is fairly powerful one wrong step and you tumble off the end into the unknown. The gate in this section is an upwards moving waterfall

5th Gate:This gate is pretty much a mirror of the 2nd gate except it also has the added danger of the waves from the 3rd gate, the gate itself in this section is a whirlpool.

6th Gate: This section is probably the most dangerous of them all, it combines waves,pitfalls,a powerful current and heavy rain, the way is dark and misty, only those trained to deal with it can move through it without any troubles.The gate at the end is a pair of ghostly knights guarding the way.

7th Gate:The 7th section is mist and cool, the air is very thing and the river but a small trickle however something deadly lurks in the mist pulling things into the river, something with long tenticals. The gate is a grand portcullis with a Kraken statue at the top.

8th Gate: The 8th section is quite and calm and welcoming, the river is quite powerful enough to pull you off your feet but nothing much else, the gate here is a large double wooden door.

9th and final Gate: the ninth section is where souls finally come, the river is still and is warm and welcoming, souls who come here come to be judged, above them is a vast sky of stars when a soul looks upon these stars they will either rise up and cease to be or will be told it is not their time and have to linger here until it is.

The Abhorsen do not belive in anything other than their Genjutsu the learning of anything else is forbidden since their genjutsu is so powerful learning of anything else would interfear with their training and remembering of the jutsu. none have ever learnt any and those who have tried were slaughtered in cold blood and sent beyond the ninth gate this is Abhorsen law.

Abhorsen Law in detail

1.An Abhorsen is an Abhorsen for life

2.Genjutsu and the Abhorsen way shall be your every breath

3.Fear not the dead or undead or the evil for the Abhorsen is above it and can overcome

4.Death is life as life is death,feel it and breath it for it is within you.

5.Do not linger from the path of light for darkness consumes and will devour you whole, the ninth gate beckons those who have fallen from grace.

All those who fail to abide by these rules she be stripped of title and soul and send beyond the ninth

Each Abhorsen carries a small book bound in human flesh and written in human blood passed down through the generations, this book carries the secrets of their jutsu it is written in a strange language only known to the Abhorsen.The origins of the book are said to be from the first Abhorsen before he turned from the darkness into the light, as time went on copies were made using leather and paper, the original is lost and said to contain more than the copies.

Clan Jutsu:

Name:Shi no jutsu no hokou: Death walk Jutsu
Rank:D
Type:Supplimentary
Element:N/A
Chakra cost:4
Description:After great training an Abhorsen member can use this jutsu to pass into death itself, it is useless unless you have the training and bell of an abhorsen, here they can talk to spirits using their unique genjutsu.

Name:Settoku ryoku ga aru aruku Jutsu: Walking dead jutsu
Rank: D
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:2
Description: To use this jutsu Akki will be using Kibeth ringing it in a semi circle left then right she will direct the sound towards her opponent. This jutsu is somewhat usless and seems to do nothing more than make the person caught in it walk against their will i what ever direction they are facing. This genjutsu has been known to make animals walk forward without control of their own limbs.It wont effect anyone genin or above or anyone who is a genjutsu user if it does happen to work it will only last 1 post

Name:Jutsu o ketsugou suru seishin:Soul bind Jutsu
Rank: C
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:6
Description: To use this Genjutsu Akki will be using her third biggest Bell Saraneth. After Ringing the bell up and down then in a strange Figure of eight the bell will ring out each note sounding different all who hear the sound will feel like they have their souls bound in place and are unable to move. This Genjutsu however isn't to powerful and can be broken using pain or a louder noise to disrupt the ringing of the bell, It is also unable to affect anybody of chuunin rank and above or those who are familiar with Genjutsu. This jutsu will only last 2 posts

Name:Suimin Jutsu no naru koto: Sound of sleep jutsu
Rank: C
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:9
Description: To use this Genjutsu Akki will be using her smallest bell Ranna. After ringing the bell up and down those who hear the sound will be cast into a deep sleep. Again this jutsu cannot affect high level Ninja and Genjutsu experts and mostly works best on small animals and shinobi of a lower rank than the user, this jutsu can be used before soul bind to make its affects alot more potent. This jutsu will only work for 3 posts

Name: Suimin Jutsu no naru koto:Genjutsu breaking peel
Rank: B
Type: Genjutsu
Element:N/A
Chakra Cost: 13
Description: To use this Genjutsu Akki will be using Mosrael after ringing the bell the sound will be enough to break the affects of most Genjutsu however it will not work against Any genjutus of the same level or above and sometimes the sound will fall flat as Mosrael is a lazy bell and doesn't like to be rung. This genjutsu lasts 5 posts

Name: shi no jutsu no kanji:Feeling of death jutsu
Rank: B
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:15
Description: With great skill and care Akki will be holding both Saraneth and Ranna, the binder and the sleeper after ringing them in a complex motion they will ring out and those who hear it will feel what it is like in death a great cold will take them and make then shiver so cold it is hard to move their body will be so cold their breath will be visable although this jutsu cannot kill it will severaly slow down anyone who hears it. Like all of the Genjutsu used by the Abhorsen it will not affect a Genjutsu user. This Genjutsu lasts 4 posts

Name: yurui shita no jutsu: Loose tongue jutsu
Rank: A
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:22
Description: Using the bell known as Dyrim Akki will direct the sound of the ring towards someone caught in the binding jutsu or very fatigued. On hearing the sound they become tranced and answer any questions she asks them thinking they are talking to a friend of boss, This Genjutsu isn't always successful and the hearer must be very tired or very bound when used. This genjutsu will last 6 posts

Name:furasshu haibu Jutsu: Flash back Jutsu
Rank: A
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:24
Description: To use this Genjutsu Akki will be using the Bell known as Belgaer. On ringing this bell the person Akki has chosen to hear it will be put into a trance and thrust back into the own mind Allowing them to remember things long forgotten or things that have been locked away from them. For this jutsu to work the hearer must be willing to have the jutsu work on them or else it just sounds like the tole of a bell. This genjutsu will last 4 posts

Name:dai 9 gēto no saishuu teki na yobidashi: Final Call of the ninth gate
Rank: S
Type: Genjutsu
Element: N/A
Chakra Cost:39
Description:This is a one use Genjutsu and one use only after ringing the largest bell known as Astarael, Whome ever is one breath away from death will be instantly sent to rest but this Jutsu holds a high price it will also send the ringer far into death with no return. This is final and will only be used when no option is left. It works by putting the dying person in a deep genjutsu that will sap that last of their stength allowing them to pass on in peace. This genjutsu is a one shot so once used kills the user also.

Age : 29 Posts : 4301

Hello Akki, before this can be accepted as a Clan a few things need to be changed first.

Signature Traits
This needs to be worked on a bit, for instance why can clan members only perform Genjutsu techniques? I understand that you've mentioned those who learn other styles or specialties will be slaughtered, but I'd like a proper explanation as to why the clan does not allow other specialties. Also explain what the Air of Seven Bells is, what it represents, what it's used for and why it's so important that members carry it around with them.

History
It's quite an odd history you've given for the clan, from killing to protecting. Since you've mentioned this nine section river, I'd like you to write up what every section means and represents please, it's so we can gain a better understanding of the clan and why they interpret death like this. You've also mentioned the Abhorsen Law, again I'd like you to write up this list of laws and why every member should follow them, also what happens if a person breaks them. Once again, it will answer questions that may be raised in the future. I'm not a total fan of this human flesh made book, it's incredibly strange and quite sickening. Plus it doesn't really add into the clan's other part of the history where they state that they use their power to save the land from evil, I believe killing someone and using their flesh for material is considered evil, no? I don't see an issue with people restricting clans, but two seems a little too restricted to be honest. I'm not going to ask you to change it but I would recommend raising it slightly.

Clan Jutsu
A problem that all of the techniques are currently facing right now is that they're not properly coded to have the subject bolded, such as 'Name, Rank, Type' etc... Please get all of them written up into the proper coding. Another issue with the techniques is that the names are quite... unoriginal. 'Death no Jutsu'? I'm sure you are capable of much more creativity then that, I'll have to ask you to go back and re - think of some of the names please, I know you can do better. I also wont be able to properly grade these techniques without fully understanding what each and every bell does, so please get that listed up as well.

Posts : 54

OK sui edited air of the bells was a typo by me was meant to be aid lol added all you wanted as well, not budging on the book though i changed it so the original is lost and all other have copies.

Age : 29 Posts : 4301

Death Walk Jutsu
You're able to pass into death itself? I'm afraid this will be denied straight away due to Elder Sage creating a Clan that is able to talk to and manipulate with spirits, plus we already have a Special Char. that allows people to communicate with the deceased. I'm also failing to understand how you're able to die through the use of such a low - ranking genjutsu.

Walking Dead Jutsu
Given the fact that this technique is completely useless and you've made it so it doesn't effect anyone, it'll be a denial.

Soul Bind Jutsu
Just mention that the genjutsu can be disrupted by using the 'Kai' technique and also how long the Genjutsu will last, plus you need to add in a Chakra Cost per Post after the initial genjutsu has been performed.

Sound of Sleep Jutsu
I'm afraid this will be a denial, we already have a technique that places those into a deep sleep. Plus you've really made it quite useless to some extent, considering your character would be a Genin and the limits this carries, you wouldn't be able to place anyone in a sleeping trance.

Genjutsu Breaking Peel
A genjutsu to break out of a genjutsu? Denied. The Kai technique is a universally known technique to break out of most genjutsu techniques.

Feeling of Death
Go into a bit more detail please as to what the person actually views while in the Genjutsu. Don't forget Chakra Cost per Post.

Loose Tongue Jutsu
Denied. We already have an Interrogation Genjutsu in the Encyclopedia.

Flash Back Jutsu
Denied. I fail to understand how this can be considered genjutsu and it also seems like a technique that would be special to the Yamanaka if anything.

Final Call of the Ninth Gate
Denied. Genjutsu techniques are unable to kill people, they're able to witness themselves being killed but they don't actually die. I also don't quite understand how the technique will also kill the user at the same time, so could you elaborate on that a bit more please.

With the techniques set aside, I believe you're going the wrong way about this clan. You've changed from a Genjutsu based clan to now a Soul Based clan with Genjutsu techniques. I also feel that you're not quite understanding what Genjutsu is by reading some of these techniques. Genjutsu techniques are simply able to manipulate with the users five sense, what they feel, what they hear, what they smell, what they taste and most importantly, what they see. Genjutsu techniques are unable to kill people in reality, they're unable to bring back memories and are unable to act as a bridge between life and death. I'd suggest having a re - think about this clan and whether you truly wish to stick with genjutsu or not. Lastly, the Chakra Cost is meant to be at the bottom of the templates.

Posts : 54

Sorry to mess you about sui but can you scrap this clan im working on something far better.

Age : 29 Posts : 4301

It's perfectly alright Akki, people change their minds all the time.

Archived.
Due to user request.